Why.

I guess I must have been crazy cause it's like 1.33am right now but instead of sleeping, I am actually blogging about my life. Like you know. Just plain rants. I am actually sitting on the bed & not giving a fuck to how my phone has only left 15% & trying hard not to cry cause my sis (who is like sleeping beside me right now) would just wake up & ask me to get the fuck off my phone & sleep. But well.. I guess I can't? So I guess tonight is like one of those nights where I have like a millionzillion thoughts running thru my mind. Oh & since my blogger seems dead, I might as well use this time to sorta make my blog alive again. So, reccently my clique experience somethin we thought would never happen? Well. So we had this huge fight with one of the member. (W) A fight over a silly thing I supposed. It was like; just the start of a normal happy outing? But then suddenly. W's bestfriend came. Like I don't know how the fuck did that person know we were at mac. Most likely W told her? Coming over & joining us was okay. Insulting us was not. The thing is W din even bother defending us. Mistake 1. It was okay. Annabel pmsing mode was super on after that. Obviously we know better than to keep our distance away from her. But W went & ask me "Are u okay with her (W's bestfriend) following us,? Why is Annabel like piss off?" Mistake 2. So am I suppose to answer "Nonono I am like superduper okay with the fact that she came & not to mention how enjoyable it was listening to her insulting us & you not even giving a flying fuck to how we were feeling at that moment. Oh and yes, Annabel is not pissed off at all and well, she is just feeling superhappy at like how much we got insulted you know. & obviously no, she is not frowning cause she's pissed. She's frowning because of the sun heat yeah." But all I did was said "IDK eh, u go ask her yourself." Blahblahblah. Went to school, PuiTing asked her, "Did u know she was insulting our clique?" W said "Yes." She said Yes. She fucking said Yes. I was there. PuiTing was there. Annabel was there. Amelia was there. We all heard it. Blahblahblah. 3 days later, it was on a Saturday. PuiTing's bdae.I msg W, talk for a while, & I ask her: "Did u heard her insulting us?" and W said "Is it she said something critisizing bout us that day? I didn hear what she say." Oh. You din hear. That's right. You din hear. Blahblahblah. Now. Idc what the hell happen. All I want to say is. I dun really know why the fuck are we even quarelling over fucking mindless stuff. But firstly. Just a SUGGESTION. Just an OPINION. Just my THINKING. Instead of telling people how sad you are, I dun get why the fucking hell u can't just apologize & solve everythin. From this, I would like to list out 2 more sub-points: Yes I really mean it when I say apologizing could save. Every. Single. Fucking. Thing. Apologizing does not means you are wrong and the other person is right; It just means that you value your relationship more than your pride. Not to say whose fault is this, but if you had really bothered to apologize, or EVEN to admit your mistake then, everything would have maybe be okay now. The other sub-point I would like to stress is: No. I am not saying it's wrong to express your feelings to others. I do that all the fucking time. I am like the biggest bitch so obviously I would rant when I am angry or sad too. But the thing is. Before you even tell others about it. Have you ever think? Think about like why the fuck are we even angry with you? Secondly, the point is. Nobody's perfect; Everyone make mistakes. I have make tons&tons of mistakes in life. Mistakes after mistakes. Regrets after regrets. But when u reflect, maybe you would think that actually, you ARE in the wrong. I have send apology message to Jasmine, Huiru, Alicia & YOU before. Yes, you. 10 pages long. No, its not about the quantity. What I am stressing now here is about the sincerity. And its that, at least I bothered. Although there must have been tons of stuff which myself, haven apologized for, but at least I would message them & clear things up. Although yeah, the Jasmine's & Huiru's thing was kidda MY fault, but Alicia's & YOUR thing wasn't really my fault. Yeah that time it was all cause of Alicia which lead ME to send u & her a 10 & 8 pages long message respectively. So I dun see why I can apology to you then, but u can't apologize to me now. But, till now I have yet to see any form of attempt from you. Maybe it more to a side of disappointment then angry? Idk. However, right now, even if you REALLY DID apologize, I do not evn know I would accept it or not. Because I had to go & BEG you for this fucking APOLOGY. Not literally beg, but u do get the idea. So. I am not really sure what to do now. Thirdly. And lastly. I would like to rant about judging. Society is funny. They ask you to be yourself, then they judge you. BUT. Stop. Think. Reflect. You have obviously judge someone in your life before. & it would be obviously more than once you judge someone. IDC how much people I had judge, or how much am I really judging W right now. But honestly. I bet you have judge people in your life before too. Everyone does. Imagine, you are in a hurry. And this person is like blocking your way in a narrow corridor. You said "Excuse Me!" like for how many godness time. But the person din move. U would start to get irritated & begin cursing the person. BUT what if the person was having stomach cramp? Or the person leg was injured? Or the person was deaf? There's many possibilties, but whatever it is, *TA-DA*, you have judge one person. Seeing a girl wearing sexily; That girl must be a slut. Seeing a guy acting like a girl; He must be gay. Seeing someone with designer goods; Wow they are rich & trying to show off their money. Seeing ITE students; PaiKia-s. Seing ugly people; Eew they must be bad. Seeing students mugging in public: Nerds. Admit it or not. We have all judge people before. So stop acting like you did not. When posting something like - "Before you start judging someone, make sure you are perfect first." - Stop. Think. Reflect. You have judge someone before too. Yeah & by reading this post, I bet lots of you are also judging me right now. But I can't be bothered. So yupp. Nights; xoxo.